Of Soldiers and Children
The Lieutenant was a military man for certain. His father had been a military man, as had his grandfather. Hell, his older brother had joined up when the good Lieutenant was still playing with toy cap guns. He had been a soldier in peacetime and in combat, and he was confident he could face any foe, wherever the superiority lie. Children, on the other hand, were an entirely different matter altogether. Even more difficult still were women, and here he was presented in a situation having to confront both.
All this, he though, could be traced back to Lloyd. Damn him. It was all that Lloyd’s fault. That’s what the Lieutenant kept saying to himself. Sergeant Lloyd was a trusted soldier and a good friend, but the Lieutenant indulged him far too much.
Then, there was that schoolteacher who was the impetus for the sergeant’s suggestion that they take the day’s leave in town. At the time, the lieutenant was not totally against the sergeant’s suggestion. In fact, he’d been working on the same train of thought himself. The men could use a little relaxation, particularly in a place that bred such obvious beauty in its women. But dammit, why here? Why this woman? Hindsight was 20/20.
Yes, that woman certainly was a pain in the ass. Not that the lieutenant was totally foreign to the concept. He had been with his fair share of beauties, even fraternizing with female officers on rare occasions, but he avoided any serious relations with women. He found they were too much trouble, and this woman was further proving his previous experience.
Damn that Lloyd for getting me into this! And damn that woman!
She was a teacher at the orphanage they now had the unenviable job of protecting. The unfortunate course of events that brought them to be trapped in this town, in this building, was merely a matter of bad timing. The lieutenant still blamed Lloyd for his purely superficial infatuation with that woman that brought them here to begin with. Of all the pretty girls in this town or the next, why did he have to find one that was so infuriating? The lieutenant certainly did hate that woman. The sergeant’s reasoning, of course, was not just the beauty but also the schoolteacher factor. “Smarts with sex appeal,” he called it. Idiot!
So here they found themselves in a serious pickle, to underestimate the situation. Once the lieutenant figured they would be stuck here at least over night, he made sure to put the sergeant on post as far away from that damn woman as possible. Of course, that backed the lieutenant into a difficult corner because now he would be stuck dealing with the woman himself. What was possibly worse was he also had the responsibility of dealing with the children as well.
If there was anything the lieutenant feared—no, not feared; had difficulty with—more than women, it was children. Of course, that infernal woman made the job as difficult as possible. As if he didn’t have anything more important to worry about, she actually expected him to help her with these little rug rats. He was sure she did it just to annoy him, giving these kids ideas about where he’d been and what it was like being a soldier. Then, there were those that wanted to touch his sidearm or other gear.
Still, he had to admit he saw a little of himself as a child in some of these young boys, but most of the time he could hardly stand it. Then, just when they were supposed to go to sleep and he’d be rid of them, his nightmare came true. They wanted to hear a story.
The teacher, that damn woman, actually thought this was a good idea that he tell them a bedtime story. Of course, they didn’t want to hear from one of the meager few books they’d undoubtedly heard countless times. They wanted to hear a story from him—a war story.
This didn’t sound too bad to the teacher as long as he didn’t tell them anything that would give them nightmares. Of course! Damn woman, what war story can I tell that is not going to give them nightmares? Then, her helpful suggestion, “Just tell them an adventure and give them a happy ending. They need to believe in a happy ending.” Sure, that was easy enough.
Then, it occurred to him, perhaps there was a story he could tell that they might not know, would enjoy, and had a great war in which the good guys win. Something from his own childhood. He would have to remember how it went, but he decided it was worth a shot and sat down with the children.
With wide-open eyes and intent ears, they waited while he cleared his throat and remembered how the tale began.
“In a hole in the ground, there lived a Hobbit…”
All stories by Peter Di Cicco
Excerpt from The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkein